Q. What is the difference between a wife and a girlfriend?
A. About 45 pounds!!

Q. What is the difference between a woman and a magnet?
A. Magnets have a positive side!

Q. What happens when a blonde gets Alzheimers disease?
A. Her IQ goes up.

Q. How can you tell when a FAX had been sent from a blonde?
A. There is a stamp on it. 

Q. Why are blonde jokes so short?
A. So men can remember them. 

Q. Why do men like blonde jokes so much?
A. Because they can understand them

Q. How do you make a blonde's eyes twinkle?
A. Shine a flashlight in their ear. 

Q. What does a blonde and a beer bottle have in common?
A. They're both empty from the neck up.

Q. Why did the blonde have tire tread marks on her back?
A. From crawling across the street when the sign said "DON'T WALK"

Q. Why did the blonde tip-toe past the medicine cabinet?
A. So she wouldn't wake up the sleeping pills 

Q. What happened to the blonde tap dancer?
A. She slipped off and fell down the drain   

Q. What did the blond do when she missed the 66 Bus?
A. She took the 33 bus twice instead.

Q. What do you call a blonde holding a brief case, up a tree?
A. The Branch Manager.

Q. Why do blondes love lightning?
A. They reckon somebody is taking their photo.

Q. Why couldn't the blonde manage to make Ice-Cubes?
A. She couldn't find the recipe.

Q. How many blondes does it take to change a lightbulb?
A. 2. 1 to hold the Diet Irn-Bru and the other to call on 'Daddddyyy'

Q. What do you get when you offer a blonde a penny for her thoughts?
A. Change.

Q. Why did God create blondes?
A. Cos sheep can't bring beer from the fridge.

Q. Why are blondes hurt by people's words?
A. Because people keep hitting them with dictionaries.

Q. How do you know a blonde has robbed your house?
A. You notice the microwave is gone, but a note is there in it's place saying: "Thanks for the TV"

Q. How do you keep a blonde in suspense?
A. (I'll tell you tomorrow.)

Q. How do you get a blonde to stay in the shower all day?
A. Lend her your bottle of Shampoo that says "lather, rinse, repeat".

Q. Why was the blonde upset when she got her Driver's License?
A. Because she got an F in sex.

Q. Why don't blondes eat pickles?
A. Because they can't get their head in the jar.

Q. How can you tell a FAX has been sent from a blonde?
A. There's a stamp on it.

Q. What happens when a blonde developes Alzheimers?
A. Her IQ goes up.

Q. How did the blonde die drinking milk?
A. The cow fell on top of her.

Q. What do you call a blonde skeleton in the closet?
A. Last year's hide and seek champion.

Q. Why did the blonde keep a coat hanger in her back seat?
A. In case she locks the keys in her car.

Q. What does a postcard from a blonde's vacation say?
A. Having a fantastic time. Where am I?

Q. How do you keep a blonde in suspense?
A. Present her with a mirror and tell her to wait for the other person to say "Hello"

Q. What would you do if a Blond threw a hand grenade right at you?
A. You'd pull the pin and throw it back.

Q. What do you do when a blonde throws a pin at you?
A. Run like hell....she's got a hand grenade in her mouth.

Q. What do a bowling ball and a blonde have in common?
A. Sooner or later they'll both end up in the gutter.

Q. How do you make a blonde laugh on Monday mornings?
A. Tell them a joke on Friday night.

Q. How do you confuse a blonde?
A. You don't. They're born that way.

Q. Why do blondes work seven days a week?
A. So you don't have to retrain them on Monday.

Q. WHY AMERICANS STOP PRINTING STAMPS WITH PHOTO OF PAMEELA ANDERSON?
A. COZ PEOPLE STARTED LICKING THE WRONG SIDE OF IT FOR PASTING THEM ON THE ENVELOPES.

Q. WHY DID SANTA SING TAKE OFF HIS CLOTHES WHILE WRITING EXAMS?
A. COZ IT WAS WRITTEN IN THE PAPER"ANSWER IN BRIEF. 

Q. WHAT DOES 98 STAND FOR IN WINDOWS 98?
A. IT STANDS FOR NUMBER OF TIMES IT HANGS IN A DAY.

Q. WHY DID BANTA SINGH TAKE HIS PREGNANT WIFE TO PIZZA CORNER?
A. FOR FREE DELIVERY.

Q. HOW WOULD YOU IDENTIFY BANTA SINGH IN A SUBMARINE?
A. HE WILL BE THE ONLY ONE WITH A PARACHUTE TIED TO HIS BACK.

Q. WHICH IS THE SHORTEST JOKE?
A. SANTA SINGH AND BANTA SINGH PLAYING CHESS.

Q. WHICH BROTHER OF KALIDAS MAKES SHOES?
A. ADIDAS